TONSILS!! AAAAACK

Here's the deal...

When I was three I got my tonsils taken out. I guess the STUPID doctor took them out wrong!


HE LEFT SOME OF MY STINKING TONSILS IN MY THROAT!!!!! I HATE MY LIFE!

ok...so now this is what's going on...

December 30th at 7:45 a.m I am having my 2nd Tonsilectomy. This is ridiculous. I mean...really really REALLY REALLY REALLY ridiculous.



AHHHH ME....

It's the most wonderful time of the year! :]

CHRISTMAS IS ONLY 4 DAYS AWAY!!! :] This is very happy!

My first semester is OVER!! Now I wish every other semester would be over so I can get married!! :]

So lots has happened since my last post. I can't seem to keep up with this thinger.

Well..basically..here's what's happend

-My roomate mooooooved out.

--I'm not sure how i feel about this. It's kind of depressing, but it's also VERY exciting to me! I get so much space now. The way it was executed was really stupid...and it hurt my feelings a lot! But now I'm pretty much over it and I am so stoked to have the room the way I want it! :)

-I'M HOME!

-- I got to go to Brad's house the night I got home! :) I got to see Whitney, Danielle, James...etc. you know...all the cool kids ;) But no really..I love them and I miss them a lot!

-I have a doctor's appt. TOMORROW!

-- Alright kids...this is a big one. Tomorrow I will officially figure out what the heck is wrong with me!!! :]..haha not really. Tomorrow they will only tell me what's wrong with my throat. There are still many many things that are wrong with me.

-ANXIETY ANXIETY ANXIETY!!

--Oh Lord please help me. That word just makes me cringe. My anxiety has gotten so much worse lately. I'm not sure why...but it seriously has gotten SO bad. I can't do much without having symptoms of an attack. The worst is when my muscles start to contract and I can't use my hands or my legs. I've gotten so sensitive to sound and light as well. This is just freaking me out!! I hate it, and I would appreciate as many prayers as I could get! I am hoping to go see a Psychiatrist this break. Hopefully soon. Then I will OFFICIALLY know what is REALLY going on in my body.

That's basically all...oh besides the fact that I have no idea what to get Andrew for Christmas!! eek!

Hm...well we'll see. It's only 4 days away...........

<-- that is Andrew's mommy and me! :)

STAY WARM!

>

WHAT IS GOING ON?

Baaaaaaaasically...the title says it all.

What is going on in my body? I went to the hospital last night.

Diagnosis? Anxiety attack..
Symptoms? Well...I apparently forgot some stuff that had just happened (says andrew), shaking, couldn't breathe, blood pressure up, heart rate up, muscle contractions, migrane...and more.

meh....

So they put an IV in me and pumped me full of saline. they also did a scan of my brain...which came out normal ;]. They also gave me a muscle relaxant for the shaking and pain meds for my migrane. Yummy right? haha no

Andrew and I were at the hospital for about 4 ish hours. We got BLT's out of the deal....and I got a nice bruise on my hand from the IV.....

I need to pray more...not only because it's good for me, but because I'm called to do it....

I can't sleep....
oh boy...8:00 class is going to come up so much faster than i want it to...

my life....

Here I am...

I don't know what you want from me, I don't know where to turn.
My life is confusing me like crazy.

Friends are wacky and crazy...and i mean that literally.
Family is good. I'm glad I get to see my whole family tomorrow. It's going to be interesting and so relieving to see them.
Andrew is more than amazing. This past week has been just amazing with him.

Last sunday during a higher ground performance I had an extreme asthma attack. Andrew was so sweet and he just stayed with me until i calmed down and all that jazz.

Lately he's just been real sweet and aring and oh my goodness...just amazing :)

Today I'm real sick. Basically because of lack of sleep and so much stress. I've had a fever all day, and I have a huge head ache. blah blah blah...it happens :)


-The End

BOO

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^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ that's basically how I feel :)


I'm getting a massage...:) it feels good.

Why do I feel like my life is spiraling out of my control?!
I hate it...

I need a vacation...a BIG one

Love...

Today is supposed to be the best day ever..

and it is totally not turning out to be that way at all..

It's my 1 year anniversary with Andrew...yet, we aren't doing anything for it.

So basically...it's just another day...even though I don't feel like it should be.

Anyway..that's all I want to say about that...

This weekend was Chorale Tour!! Twas fun...but I lost my voice.
Then this morning Higher Ground sang in chapel, which was fun, except my throat was killing me.. but now my voice is back...

and Chorale has a concert tomorrow night.

BUSY BUSY BUSY BUSY BUSY BUSY BUSY BUSY BUSY!!!!!

blah blah blah...this is a boring post...
sorry :)

It's like I can't breathe...

Here I stand...empty hands
Wishing my wrists were bleeding to stop from the pain from the beating
There you stood holding me
Waiting for me to notice you

But who are you?

You are the truth, outscreaming these lies
You are the truth, saving my life

The warmth of your embrace
Melts my frostbitten spirit
You speak the truth and I hear it
The words are I love you
And I have to believe in you


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Well..boo

Lately

Wow, I'm really excited about this blog thinger!
My friend Whitney has one so I decided I may want one too! :)

I don't know who all is going to look at this, but I'm just going to type my daily thoughts.

First off, I'd like to say that I am in love! :) Being in love is so AWESOME! :) Everyday brings something new...and everyday brings more and more joy!!!!!!!!

It is so great.
Besides being in love...life is well...life.
School is school...friends are friends...family is family.

My friends here at school are so amazing...and I cannot lie about that. I miss my friends from back home though. It's seriously insane. There will be days where I'll tell myself to just "move on"...but I really can't. I miss everybody so much!

Life isn't the same without them in it.

Andrew and I have been church shopping for a while. We have gone to 3 different churches. It will be hard for us to really get to know a church because we will have Higher Ground gigs on sundays . Not every sunday...but quite a few.

We are both looking for jobs. We applied at Wal-Mart. Hopefully that pulls through. Andrew may also get to help out Bolivar High School with their drumline/percussion section. That will be so good for him! :)

If Wal-mart doesn't have any positions open, I will probably try to get a job at a restaurant to make some fast cash. Money is SOOOO tight right now. Andrew and I went to the Arkansas vs. Tula game which ate up a lot of my money, but it was fun :)
Now it's back to school, and homework, and no fun ;)

I hope everybody has a good day!

"O Lord, you are our Father. We are the clay, and you are the potter. We are all formed by Your hand." ---Isaiah 64:8